


The lack of color in my eyes

by sweetysatori



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Gay Male Character, M/M, Major character death - Freeform, readit, sadIthink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-25
Updated: 2017-06-25
Packaged: 2021-03-12 05:47:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29005545
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetysatori/pseuds/sweetysatori
Summary: You can see colors when you are loved back, but Iwaizumi notices that Oikawa, his friend, is getting colder and the color is fading in his eyes.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime & Oikawa Tooru
Kudos: 3





	The lack of color in my eyes

A normal day like every  
You have friends-  
A friend-  
Family-  
You have-...  
Nothing.  
———————————————————

Iwaizumi had been standing here for 15 minutes, waiting for his friend.  
Oikawa always manages to be late, huh?

Sighing, he looked at the blue sky, the green trees and the yellow sun that shines strongly today.  
He could only see all of this because of Oikawa.  
He was very grateful because life sucked in a gray world.

“I'm sorry Hajime! I overslept! "Oikawa shouted as he ran to Iwaizumi with a toast of bread in his mouth.  
“About time, Shittykawa! Come on, I don't want to be late again!"   
"But first I want my morning kiss!"  
"Yes, come here."  
Oikawa padded happily to Iwaizumi only to be involved in a small but loving kiss.

"Oh wow, the sun is shining strong today!" Said Oikawa.  
"Yup, do you want to have some ice cream after training, Tooru?"  
Iwaizumi asked with a smile on his face.  
"Only if you invite me!"  
"No problem."  
Iwaizumi was mostly strict with Oikawa but he loved him with all his heart.  
In love he looked at his lover. At that time Iwaizumi had gathered all his courage and confessed his love to Oikawa by giving him a rose and bowing. At that moment it was dead quiet and he was afraid that Oikawa would think he was an idiot...in the end a pair of soft lips lay on his.  
Because actions are better than words.  
If you think too much, you will achieve little.

“Hey Matsun! Makki! "The captain greeted his comrades happily. This person has no problems either, does he? Iwaizumi thought with a giggle. He is happy to see Oikawa smile.  
"Hey captain in a good mood today, huh?" Makki joked around.  
"Sure Iwa-chan invited me on a date!"  
"Hey! You idiot who said this was a date ?! "  
"MEEEEEE!" Came from Oikawa while showing Iwa his tongue.  
"You...-"  
"If you want to change it, catch me!"  
The captain mostly behaved like a little child.  
But hey, life should be enjoyed.  
No matter how old you are, inside you always remain a child.  
"You idiot! Come here!"  
Iwaizumi chased Oikawa through the whole school until he finally gave up because he was running out of breath.  
"Ok,ok you won, that's a date."  
"Well the beautiful, great, cool, charming, aw-"  
"Is that going to be something?"  
"Hey don't interrupt me! - So the awesome and popular Oikawa is always right! "  
"Peep wrong!" Came from Iwaizumi.  
"Iwa!"

"Are you idiot coming now?"  
The bag packed and dressed, Iwaizumi stood in front of the gym.  
"yeahhh!"  
Oikawa hopped over to Iwaizumi, tying his shoes.

"So what kind of ice cream do you want?"  
"Can I have two bullets?"  
Oikawa's eyes sparkled expectantly. Huh ...  
"Fine."  
"Thank you! So one bullet strawberry and um ... vanilla! "  
Iwaizumi just nodded and turned, then to the cashier.  
"So an ice cream with two bullets of Mhm ... yep strawberry & vanilla and a bullet of mango for me."  
When he got the ice cream he handed one to Oikawa whose eyes were more than glittering.

"Thanks Hajime!" Oikawa thanked him as they stood at the intersection.  
"No problem - come here Tooru."  
He kissed the taller one passionately and looked him in the eye. "I love you."  
"I love you too."

Iwaizumi was on the way home. He was happy.  
He was really happy with his life, he thought, looking up at the dark blue sky adorned with twinkling yellow stars.

The morning came.  
The city was adorned with beautiful colors. Different colors everywhere.  
Green, blue, red, yellow ... and more.  
It was the weekend and Iwaizumi decided to go for a walk.  
He got dressed and left, then the house.  
It was 11:00AM in the morning.  
Iwaizumi decided to go to the park.  
He looked around. Everywhere there were happy people but also sad people who still lived in the gray world.  
He was walking around relaxed  
There were many children who played, ran or laughed.  
You saw couples in love walking around hand in hand.  
He sat happily on a bench next to an old lady.

"Oh? Young man, I didn't even notice you. "  
"Oh - is it okay if I sit here anyway?"  
"Sure, sit still and what are you doing here so early in the morning?"  
"Oh, I just wanted to take a walk and enjoy nature."  
The old lady gave him a knowing look. "The love of your life loves you back?"  
"Yes, I was lucky ..." he said happily while thinking of Tooru.  
"That's nice. Enjoy it before it changes. "Came from the grandma as she stared at the floor.  
"To change? What do you mean?"  
"It can always happen that your lover finds another person and leaves you ..." she explained while looking at the sky.  
“You know boy my lover fell in love with someone else because I wasn't enough for him. That day I lost the color in my eyes. I don't have long to live either. "  
"I'm very sorry, but may I ask what the last sentence means? ..." he asked uncertainly.  
"If you haven't had any color in your eyes after your first boyfriend or girlfriend for more than two months, the color in your body and your organs are getting slower and slower you get sick and your face becomes pale ... you will die. Life doesn't always have positive things to offer. There are good sides in life, but also bad ones. "  
the old lady looked at the colorless sky.  
"Oh ... I didn't know that ... I'm sorry." He really didn't know what to say.  
"It’s ok..I understand that you are speechless not always heard something like that, you know? But I'm kind of happy to go too. Because I prefer heaven to this world. "  
"I see ..." came Iwaizumi meekly.  
“Thank you for listening to me, I really needed someone to talk to about it. I have to go. "Said the old lady with a small smile on her face.  
"Always my pleasure And could I walk you home?"  
"Of course."  
Iwaizumi was still thinking about the lady's words.  
He sighed. He didn't know, but he wasn't interested either, because Oikawa would never leave him, would he?

It was Sunday and Iwaizumi was bored. He didn't feel like doing homework, games or sports. He wanted to see Tooru.  
Sighing, he stared at the chat that had taken place 3 minutes ago.

—————————————-  
I: Hey Tooru, do you want to do something?  
O: Hey Iwa-chan ♡ ︎  
O: Sorry I would like to, but I still have an important meeting  
I: Aha and important meeting with who?  
O: Oh,with someone, I'll tell you tomorrow! I have to go BYEEE  
(˘ ³˘) ♥ ︎  
I: Ugh ... yeah yeah bye ♡ ︎

———————————  
What should he do now? Even Oikawa doesn't have time.  
The old lady's words suddenly crossed his mind. Maybe ... should he google it ... it never hurts to find out a little more about it.

He turned on his laptop. His fingers always clicked a button.  
He opened various websites.  
Iwaizumi read everything through. He didn't know why but suddenly he had found interest in the subject. He wanted to know all about it.  
Until now he knew that there is only one cure by confessing your love to your second crush within two months and hoping that she will return your love.  
That makes no sense Iwaizumi thought. What if you don't have a second crush?  
How are you supposed to fall in love with someone in just two months?  
It's all so unfair ...  
He didn't know why but tears welled up in his eyes ...  
He didn't know why but he was crying ...  
And he didn't know why but he cried himself to sleep ...

Iwaizumi woke up groaning from his not exactly good sleep. His back hurts and he must have fallen asleep on his desk yesterday.  
First, then he noticed the laptop that was still on and overheated ... and only then did he notice that it was 10:00 AM ?! He had missed two hours!  
Why didn't anyone wake him up ?!  
He checked his cell phone. Why didn't anyone call him where he was? ...

Iwaizumi blinked a few times to see the bright green with the white symbol and the name "WhatsApp" underneath. The green wasn't as bright as always.  
'It was probably because I slept badly,' he thought to himself.  
There cannot be any other reason.

He got ready tired.  
He didn't care if he missed two hours or not. He still wanted to go to school, it sounded strange but it was like that he wanted to see Oikawa and his friends and he also wanted to take part in the training.

"You are not coming to practice today?!"  
"I'm sorry Iwa-chan, I still have an appointment haha ..." Oikawa apologized. Iwaizumi sighed.  
“Sure, I'll take over as vice captain. Goodbye I love you. "  
he said and gave Oikawa a little kiss on the cheek.  
"Bye!" Were Oikawa's last words before he ran to his "appointment".

“Iwaizumi! Watch out!"  
PAM  
"Oh god, are you all right ?!"  
Iwaizumi rubbed his head in pain. "You are very unfocused," said Yahaba.  
"Mmm..I think I'll go earlier today ... I don't feel well ... or..Training is over, go home."  
"But what-" wanted Kindaichi to start talking.  
"I'm sorry," he said quickly and went to the locker room.  
What's wrong with me?! Why am I so unfocused? Oikawa ... it's Oikawa. Lately I've got the feeling he's hiding something from me. But it's just a dumb feeling.  
Just a stupid feeling.  
With his eyes down on the floor, Iwaizumi made his way home.  
And it was like that every day.  
Oikawa always had an excuse when the boys wanted to hang out with him or when he was training. He rarely showed up during training.  
And from day to day the colors in Iwaizumi's eyes faded, but he too was looking for excuses for this happening like "it will be back tomorrow" "is definitely due to this energy"  
but deep down he had the feeling that something was going wrong here.

"Hajime!" Came from below.  
"Yes mom?"  
"Are you coming down for a moment?"  
"Sure."

"What is?"  
"We don't have anything left in the fridge, please go shopping, here the shopping list and the money." She said while handing the things over to her son.  
Sighing, he made his way to the supermarket.

"Excuse me?" He heard from the side. He turned to face the person and his heart stopped. The girl in front of him had no color. There was no color in his eyes. He had read that if a person in your life had none Color, then the person should not do you any good.  
"How can I help you?"  
he said politely anyway.  
"Can you maybe give me a packet of noodles from up there?" She said while pointing with her finger at a packet of noodles.  
"Sure." He handed her the noodles, she thanked him and left.  
Iwaizumi stared after her until she disappeared behind one of the shelves.   
He doesn't even know this girl how should she do him no good then  
'Cause he doesn't think he'll see this girl again

Sighing, he went to the cash register and paid.  
Why is everything so complicated.  
The only thing he knew back then was that you get the color in your eyes when your crush loves you back. And now he had found out so many things and wondered how he couldn't have known it all. Creepy.

He groaned and tipped his head back.  
And watched the sun go down slowly. He ignored the fact that he saw the sun as a bright translucent yellow, because normally it is mostly orange at dusk.

Annoyed, he turned around the whole time. He couldn't sleep. Once it was cold and once it was hot. But one thing does not let him go.  
Why is the world like this? It's unfair ... So unfair ... what if you don't want to fall in love again and then only have 2 months?  
Only now did he realize how unfair this world actually was.  
You shouldn't always look to the good side of the world, but also to the bad.

He took his cell phone and checked the time.  
1:20 am - it's getting late, but he still looked at his lock screen a photo of him and ... Oikawa.  
He stared at Oikawa.  
Oikawa's skin was pale, he couldn't see the colors properly, they were faint.  
"I'm sure I'm just tired .."  
he told himself.

Iwaizumi said that the world was unfair but he should also see reality and face the truth.

Annoyed, he groaned when he got his test back.  
"Hey Iwa what grade do you have?"  
"5-"  
"I have a 2+!"  
"Nice for you." He uttered annoyed and looked away.  
Is Mattsun's bag yellow or orange? He can't see it.  
He looked through the window, because heaven. The tough blue is losing its color, he thought  
"Iwa is what? Why are you crying?"  
Caught he looked at Oikawa. What? He cries? His fingers brushed his eyes, he felt a hot liquid. "Are you okay?" Oikawa asked again. "Yes, everything is okay."

"So the lesson is over you can go home."  
Iwaizumi got up and packed his things. "Are you coming Tooru?"  
Oikawa looked at him uncertainly.  
"Well, you know Iwaizumi, I still have something to do so you go." With these words, Oikawa ran away quickly.  
Iwaizumi? No Iwa-chan or Hajime?

And again he was on his way home. Without Oikawa. All alone.  
Iwaizumi was walking past an alley when he heard a child crying.  
He stopped and went into the alley.  
A little girl was sitting on the floor, her eyes crying.  
"Hey what's wrong?" Iwaizumi asked. "My ... grandma ... passed away today ..." she stuttered.  
"Hey everyone has to leave this world. But your grandma will be in a nice place. She will protect you from above. She will make a giant rainbow shine over you. She will always live in your heart! So come dry your tears. "Iwaizumi said. He didn't know when he'd learned how to comfort so well.  
"For real?.."  
“I am 100% sure! Your grandma didn't want to see you cry so bad, did she? "He smiled at her.  
"No, I don't think so," said the girl. "Come on I'll take you home."  
Iwaizumi was mostly scary but he is nice and helps other people.

They walked hand in hand through the streets.  
He was just about to start talking when ... he saw something he shouldn't see. It was in slow motion.  
They both laughed, hand in hand, with ice cream, happily.  
Oikawa and the girl from the supermarket ....  
His heart ached terribly.  
The girl had no color, Oikawa's color also slowly disappeared ...  
He quickly looked away and turned off at the intersection.  
"You live here?"  
"Yes!"  
"Alright." He pressed the doorbell. A petite and pretty woman in her mid-30s opened the door.  
She couldn't even say a word, the girl jumped on the lady with a "Mama!"  
"Skyyy! Where have you been ?! I was worried..“  
she said and hugged her child tightly.  
"And you?..."  
"Ah! I'm Iwaizumi Hajime, I found the girl crying in the alley, explaining that her grandma had died. "

"Mummy! Mummy! Is it true that Grandma is in a beautiful place now?" The girl said happily.  
The mother looked at her child with a smile.  
"Yes. Yes, that's right. "She agreed.  
"Thank you for finding my daughter," she bowed.  
“It's something we take for granted. It was my pleasure."

He went home smiling.  
But...  
his smile faded when he thought of Oikawa again.  
Who was this girl  
Is it the reason why he never comes to training or never walks home with him?  
Is she the reason why he didn't say "I love you too"?  
He stopped with shocked eyes. His heart ached. The world completely lost its color.  
Everything turned gray. The sun ... the meadows ... the trees ... the sky ... everything turned gray ...  
It was like a nightmare ...  
WAKE UP! WAKE UP! But nothing worked, everything stayed gray.  
He quickly ran home and locked himself in his room.  
He looked around his room. No colors all cold.  
He turned on the light but everything stayed as it is.  
Iwaizumi panicked. Tears formed in his eyes. He collapsed in the middle of his room. With his left hand he clung to his shirt where his heart lay.  
He cried a lot, everything hurt, his vision was blurred ...  
He cried without knowing that Oikawa was kissing the love of his life.

That's how it started.  
Iwaizumi didn't tell anyone about it.  
He lived in his gray world.  
Only when the worst happens you realize everything ...  
Oikawa betrayed him.  
Why is he always late? He wrote with a girl.  
He had an "appointment" rather a date.  
He must have made out with this girl after school ...  
But what should Iwaizumi do?  
If Oikawa loves the girl he can't help it ...  
He has two months ... if he can't find anyone, that was it ... but does Iwaizumi really want to live? He has just lost the lust for life.  
Oikawa was the most important thing in his whole life.  
What does he have left now?  
His family? No. His parents divorced a week ago and each found a new man / woman ...  
His friends? He realizes they are turning everything away from him ...  
Is there still a reason to live?  
He doesn't want to love a new person ...  
It would be better to just die. . .

In pain he turned around in bed the whole time.  
'It has become difficult to breathe,' he thought to himself with an inexplicable smile.  
Breathing was difficult, as was sleeping ... He didn't eat much either.  
A little laugh escaped him.  
His life has turned out to be hell, huh?  
Another little laugh until he cried ... his life has become hell ... he bit his lip.  
He has to stay calm.  
Crying doesn't help either.

The day had come.  
He wanted to talk to Oikawa about it.  
Oikawa was at his home.  
"Oi Tooru!" He called.  
Oikawa Walked to him. With every step the bigger one came closer, his heart beat faster.  
"Yes?"  
Iwaizumi's gaze fell on the floor.  
"I love you," he said sheepishly.  
First Oikawa looked at him questioningly before he put on a fake smile.  
"I know it."  
Hot tears flowed from Iwaizumi's eyes. He suppressed a few sobs. He bit his lip hard. He tugged on Oikawa's shirt with one hand.  
"Nice that you know, but I want to hear it from you too!" He shouted.  
"Oh! Mister Perfect can't say it because he found a new one. A pretty princess! ”He grew louder with every word.  
Oikawa looked at him amazingly before laughing uncertainly.  
"What are you talking about Iwaizumi?"  
"Do not act like that! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! You do not love me! SAY IT! DON'T LOVE ME!"This time he looked Oikawa straight in the eyes with a hateful look. Oikawa's smile disappeared monotonously, he looked at him.  
“I'm sorry Iwaizumi, I don't love you. I found another one. Now let go. "So he freed himself from Iwaizumi.  
He went down and left the house.  
Hajime looked into nothing with huge eyes. He froze in this position. His heart broke into small pieces.  
He finally collapsed. He cried and kept screaming for Tooru who didn't come.

The last month almost passed.  
Another week and then the second month was over. Iwaizumi had been on sick leave for the whole week. After this announcement, he never spoke to Oikawa again.

His condition had worsened. His skin was pale and there were deep circles under his eyes. He had lost more than 10 kilograms. His lungs were slow and his heart was about to stop.  
Slowly he put his cell phone in hand. He went on the chat from him and Oikawa. Oikawa had blocked him. Apparently he didn't want anything to do with Iwaizumi.

Iwaizumi looked at the ceiling.  
Life is unfair...

The days passed.  
The last day was on.  
Today at 12:00AM he would take his last breath.  
He went on Instagram and looked at Oikawa's profile. He had posted a lot of photos with his new girlfriend and deleted those of himself and Iwaizumi. He went to chat and made a voice message.  
He sighed contentedly when it was 8:00 p.m. Another 4 hours and then he will leave this world.

Oikawa I still love you.  
Can you imagine  
You were the most important thing in my life.

Satisfied, he looked around his colorless room.

Time passed.  
10 p.m.  
11 p.m.  
11:50 p.m.

11:55 p.m.

An indescribable feeling ran through him. He saw different photos, moments.

When he first met Oikawa.  
The two went to elementary school together.  
They laughed and played volleyball together.  
"I love you too, Hajime."  
The kiss.  
The date.  
Everything he remembered everything.

For God's sake keep me awake ...

And, then it came ... his body went colorless, his heart stopped beating ... his lungs, his kidneys ... everything stopped.  
With the last of his strength he got a  
"I love you Tooru" out. His eyes became heavier and heavier and his vision blurred.  
A small smile formed on his lips.  
Sayonara world.

The next morning his mother and stepfather came back from the business trip and found him dead on the bed with a smile on his face.

Time of death: 12:00 AM

-

Oikawa, crying, listened to the voice message over and over again.

"Hey Tooru how are you? I hope good....  
Don't be sad when it ends, we both knew it from the start, but it was worth all the pain.  
Enjoy your life with your new girlfriend and don't let my death stop you from marrying her if she is the right one.  
I love you."

We may not see each other now, but maybe one day we can end up in the same story together.  
In a story in which we live happily ever after.

**Author's Note:**

> Was this even sad?


End file.
